Persuasive writing why we should fix our feld

 We have been having a go at writing a piece of persuasive writing . Here is my piece of writing about why we should fix our field.  

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Title A Short Statement about the topic. eg. ‘Rugby League Is A Great Sport’	Fix Our Field!
Overview/ Statement of position A brief statement of your view about the topic.  What you believe or want to argue.	I strongly believe that our field (whira) needs to be fixed! This is because the field was constantly out of use, we need the field for special events, we have specific PE gear we are not using and we need the space to train for tournaments. For these reasons our field needs to be fixed.
Series of Arguments Reasons Your points supporting your view about the topic.  Your arguments to support your statement and information to support these arguments. Remember -argument -supporting detail, reasons, examples	Firstly, the field used to be constantly muddy and out of use. By fixing the field it will not be so muddy so we should be able to use it more often.
	Secondly, we need the field (whira) for the hangi and special events. When the field is really muddy we can't dig a hole to put the hangi in because there is too much water.
	Thirdly, we need  the field (whira) for our PE gear. The PE gear is expensive and going to waste because we don't have space to use it.
	Finally, we need the field to train for tournaments and sporting events. We need the field to get fit (ora) and get better skills so we can do better at the tournament.
Concluding statement Summing it up.  A summary of your arguments and your view on the topc	In conclusion we need to fix our field because the field is always muddy and we need the field so we can have our special events. Our PE gear needs to be used and we all need the space to run around to keep us fit. Please fix our field urgently!